Sensitive Children and the Adult Child in the Abusive Narcissistic Home

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In a home affected with an abusive narcissistic parent emotions are repressed and become twisted.  Rules are built on shame, guilt, or fear.  Feelings are often not shared and when they are expressed, it is done in a judgmental manner placing blame on one another.  The narcissistic parent is self-involved and feels no empathy for their children.  They are incapable of mirroring real love and try to get their children to fulfill their unmet dependency needs.  The narcissistic parent’s unresolved drives for attention and caretaking takes center stage as the child’s early developmental needs are ignored and denied.  The self-involved parent shames the child for having desires and makes them feel guilty.  All of the family attention and energy is focused on the demands of the narcissist.

Sensitive children growing up in abusive narcissistic homes build their personalities based on what they have to do to survive.  Many of these children learn early in their development to hide out and not draw attention to his or her needs.  They learn to act busy and look good.  Because they lack the needed support and positive role models they are more vulnerable to certain emotional and relationship problems.  This makes maintaining healthy boundaries in relationships difficult. A common personality pattern of sensitive children is that of a people pleaser or a codependent.  Sensitive children try to make others in the home feel better.  As adults they find it difficult to ask for what they need and tend to seek validation and reassurance from others (their parents) who are unwilling to give them this type of support.  They develop an exceptionally high tolerance for emotional pain and inappropriate behavior.  They are very responsive to the family’s feelings and in adulthood this coping behavior often leads to unhealthy extremes.   Codependent children spend their early childhood development years trying to “fix” the family sadness, fears, anger, and problems of everyone.   The sensitive child is always trying to make life easier for others.  The damage from pleasing others and making them feel better is never showing their own disappointment to anyone.  They tend to never disagree and are the first to apologize when they are being abused.  Perpetrators are attracted to them and enjoy witnessing their apologizing while they abuse.  The codependent adult becomes the narcissist’s perfect victim for contempt and feelings of omnipotence.

In adulthood the effects of growing up in a narcissistic family become apparent.  These adult children begin to feel a loneliness that doesn’t make sense to them.  They feel different from others and often find themselves depressed.  They might experience increasing feelings of fear and anxiety.  They have problems with intimacy and maintaining a close relationship.  They tend to find themselves in relationships with abusive partners (narcissists) and or substance abusers.  Codependent’s may develop problems of their own with substance abuse, alcohol, food, spending and compulsive caretaking.  They begin to rationalize these behaviors and those of their partners.  As their partner’s (friends, bosses) abusive behaviors increase their rationalizations for inappropriate behavior have already become a normal way of life.  They learn early to act as if nothing is out of the ordinary when someone is acting abusive.  They feel totally alone and believe talking to the abuser will not help.  And they are right because the people around them are not sane.  They have learned others will not be there for them emotionally and this belief becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Hiding feelings leads to repressing, denying, and minimizing and makes true expression of emotions in relationships challenging.

This is not a life sentence because new behavior can be learned.  Hope lies in learning a language for what happen to you growing up and using your emotional pain to motivate change.  Change and growth are possible.  You can learn entitlement to your feelings and give yourself permission to say no to what feels bad. Many adult children of narcissistic parents do best by taking a break from their family of origin to stop more damage to self-esteem.  The biggest challenge is giving yourself permission to learn what is right for you and developing endurance for sitting with the bad feelings that come up when you are breaking the family rules.  You are likely the only one who can change in your family and will need to accept that your parents are incapable of loving you in a healthy way.  It is important to find mentors or healthy friends that support your courage to experience the love and life you deserve. The development of self-acceptance from facing adversity is your freedom from quiet desperation and will be a great gift you earn.

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Thank you for reading this article. I’ve dedicated my personal and professional life to the importance of non-violence and self-compassion by teaching from my experience.  As a result, I’ve learned a lot about what it takes to create healthy relationships.  And, as I learn and grow, I teach self-compassion and give advice I use myself, in the hopes that it helps you to improve your own life.

Roberta

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35 thoughts on “Sensitive Children and the Adult Child in the Abusive Narcissistic Home

  1. Thank-you so much for this article. I am a child of a narcissistic mother, and narcissistic/histrionic/enabler father. I am codependent. I only realized what my parents were after their separation 10 years ago. My mother is a fraud artist and my father has pelted away hundreds of thousands of dollars behind my mother’s “investment” schemes. She used her family members, friends, you name it and has zero remorse. She used my personal information and destroyed my credit before I was 20 years of age. I was taught the it was my job to never complain, always smile, and listen to each of my parents’ problems. I was not allowed to have needs of my own. 9 years ago I married a man who seemed to be perfect for me. It turns out he is an alcoholic. After we got married, he became physically, verbally, and emotionally abusive. He controlled my money. I gave him access to my bank account but I did not have access to his. I was always broke. I had no where to go because my parents had separated and both were in a bad way. I stayed with him for 4 years but the disrespect got so bad that I packed my things and left. I had no intention of going back and went to see a lawyer. I was living with my dad because I didn’t have an income. The stress from the marriage, my parents separation, finding out the destruction my mother had caused, and downsizing from my job pushed me to the point of being severely ill. My dad became incredibly controlling and started treating me like some sort of pseudo wife while I was living with him. It was gross and made me sick to my stomach. I worked hard at sending out resumes so that I could find a job and get a place of my own. Growing up, every time I would ask my parents for help, they always expected repayment in some way that was a direct violation of my boundaries so I stopped asking. My husband kept calling and coming by my fathers’ house to see me and would not sign the divorce papers. I told him that if he was willing to go to counseling, we could maybe work on the marriage. I did not want to get back together with him but my father got extremely abusive and I asked my husband to help me find an apartment. Thanks to my fear, I let him move in with me. We went to counseling for 2 years and our counselor was a recovering alcoholic. In hindsight, he did not take me seriously when I told him my mother was narcissistic. He was trying to force us to believe we were perfect for each other. Here we are today…he is still drinking but does not hit me. He refuses to clean up after himself so I find myself wasting a lot of my precious time cleaning up after a grown man. He is irresponsible and thinks I should fill the role of his mother who is also a psychopath. She was EXTREMELY abusive, not nurturing, and selfish. She is an alcoholic and is very rejecting. She used to verbally abuse me when my husband and I first got married and he would do nothing. He and his siblings were happy she wasn’t picking on them. I became their family punching bag also. We just got back from vacation. I spent my time reading a book on co-dependence and quite frankly, I am sick of this marriage. Thanks to his drinking and poor lifestyle his sperm count is low. We went to a fertility clinic and for several months I did cycle monitoring. It was a waste because every month when they would tell us to “try” he would spend the entire week of ovulation getting bombed. His thing is chugging vodka at night to deal with anxiety. I’m sick of him. I am so angry because we were supposed to start in vitro next month but he decided to drink and also smoke packs of cigars while on vacation. This means that his count and sperm quality will be poor. I will be 36 this year and I don’t know what’s wrong with me!!! I feel like I can’t get away from people like him. I also have no family because I chose to go no contact with my mother and sister who have been slandering me on the internet and anywhere else they can and the rest of my family is abroad – they don’t know me anymore. I only have a few friends but I don’t feel comfortable telling them about this. I always wondered how I wound-up with an alcoholic if my parents never drank…this explains it all. I have never enabled him but I can’t seem to just kick him out for good. He is literally sabotaging our chances of successful IVF so I told him I am not doing it. I am not willing to put my body through that kind of hell and he’s not even acknowledging how difficult in vitro actually is on the body. He is also not acknowledging that due to his poor lifestyle choices, there is a greater chance the procedure will fail…that means I will have to deal with a miscarriage. The book I read really opened my eyes to how selfish he really is. I have no idea what is normal and what I should expect from a man. My father was a cowardly people pleaser in public and a bully at home. He was my mother’s flying monkey who recently stabbed me in the back to please my mother even though their divorce case just wrapped up after 10 years of litigation. My mother constantly found ways to exploit me so in theory I know what’s right and wrong but I just can’t seem to live that way. Any advice you can provide would be greatly appreciated. Oh, what is bothering me the most is that I know that both my parents are hoping we divorce because they think that is their way back into my life…so that they can pick-up where they left off.

    • Dear Sunny,

      Thank you for writing to me. I am hoping you have come to some resolution since you wrote to me. I encourage you to seek guidance from a therapist that specializes in family systems therapy and knows the narcissistic personality well. It is imperative that you get support for your recovery. You have learned some strong sabotaging behaviors that interfere in nurturing yourself and need to be released. Recovery takes time and I imagine you feel frightened, confused, and vulnerable. I can see from what you wrote that you are a capable woman. Hard times, stressful times will not last forever, but are part of growing and moving forward. You have a right to separate from your family members for a period of time. You also have a right to create a life that brings you joy and nurturing self-acceptance. Please be gentle with yourself through the change and grief. I am wishing you an abundance of self-love.

      Best Regards,
      Roberta

  2. Hi,
    I stumbled upon this researching how narcissism affects children.
    Just discovering my partner of 20 years is a nacissist and I his ever willing codependent.
    I am astonished at how this article describes my childhood and my behaviours now. I don’t need to research the impact this is going to have on my children, they can go two ways like him or me, and I can judge that by the way my children react. I now understand how I came to be in this position, having worked my young heiny off to get out of the hell of my childhood I was a sitting duck for the next preditor to come along. I am ever grateful for my decision to seek professional help, I will surpass this and my children will be taught how to have healthy, fulfilling and positive relationships. I am only a victim if I allow myself to be.
    Thank you

  3. This is me…. No longer in a relationship, I now find myself in this situation with my adult son. I feel that I will forever be this person… Afraid, crippled and not living my own life. The stress of life as a child has repeated itself throughout my entire life… Abusive relationships with narcissists… Marriage to one who terrorized me and my children until I finally threw him out… Them immediately into another abusive relationship and then another … Now that I am free of a partner, I realize that I have allowed my Son to be my master, and verbally abuse and belittle my worth … I have lost my joy and I struggle constantly to find a way into the light … Thank you for helping me to further understand my own behaviour… I am in this battle for freedom, and I will find it.

  4. Very helpful and I am so glad I am in that part of my recovery to be able to see my narc parents’ abusive behaviour so clearly now and have self compassion for myself and my cptsd. I have also finally married a healthy partner, after many failed relationships with narcissists..Its a tough journey, but progress is possible..I have had to sit with the uncomfortable feelings of change, anxiety and fear of the unknown ‘healthy’ intimacy for years now, but I am getting more and more used to being loved and respected by my husband. I wish the same to all of you on here! Thanks for sharing. Hugs

  5. Reblogged this on Lucky Otter's Haven and commented:
    excellent article about the devastating effect narcissistic parents have on the most sensitive children in the family and why they tend to become scapegoats. But this doesn’t have to be a life sentence. Read on.

  6. Pingback: Sharing a link… | The Project: Me by Judy

  7. Pingback: Sensitive Children and the Adult Child in the Abusive Narcissistic Home | FOUNDATION FOR THE CHILD VICTIMS OF THE FAMILY COURTS

  8. Reblogged this on salixisme and commented:
    I was so this child! It is frightening how your childhood can affect your thoughts, actions and relationships in your later life!

    This is something I have learned in a treatment program I have just completed – Life-traps…. one of the biggest problems there is. The theory is that this is learned behaviour that helps you survive childhood trauma or threats… and then you keep repeating that behaviour over and over and over again even into adulthood because that is all you know. And it does not necessarily work well once you are an adult.
    I am slowly working my way through this with lots and lots of therapy… and I am getting there. I am getting to be healthy and I hope eventually that I will be able to have a healthy relationship.

    Hug your children close, they are precious and should always be loved…

  9. Thank you very much for this. I’m in my sixties. After a year and a half with a great therapist, a whole lot of unburying an understanding has happened. It’s been absolutely amazing and liberating. I went into this not know anything, other than I wasn’t happy, etc. All I can say to people with similar backgrounds, follow your heart. Because it’s a good heart.

    • Rick,
      Thank you for commenting. The sensitive adult child of toxic parents is a special person and often has important work to do in the world. Their first job is learning to love themselves. I am wishing you much self-compassion and an abundance of love.
      Regards,
      Roberta

    • Kelly,
      Thank you for commenting on my post. There are three basic rules that are common in narcissistic homes. “Don’t Talk,” “Don’t Trust,” and “Don’t Feel.” Don’t talk about what’s going on in your home, especially about the pain. Keep the secret about what goes on behind closed doors. Don’t trust anyone. Children are raised on broken promises with psychological and physical boundaries being violated. Don’t feel the profound sadness, fear, frustration, loneliness, or quiet desperation. As I say in the article, this is not a life sentence. When you complete your unmet developmental needs and/or emotional work an amazing person evolves with much to contribute. If this post describes your experience, please show up for yourself and let safe people help you.
      Regards,
      Roberta

      • Roberta, I cannot tell you how glad I am to have come across this article and your comment up above this one…about “Don’t Talk, Don’t Trust, and Don’t Feel.” And how very sadly true that is. I’m 29 and had it brought to my attention by my mom less than 2 years ago that my father was a narcissist. I thank God above every day for my mother, because it seems no one else but her truly understands what I’m going through and what all I’ve been through because she, too, went through it with my father for 23 years. And to think, all my childhood life, because my mom intimidated my narc father, he did his best to turn me and my brother against her, and she knew it the whole time, but no matter the attitudes and disrespect I had for her (my brother wasn’t turning against his mother), she still loved me unconditionally. For a long time, he had me thinking she was a horrible person, and at times I even treated her as such. I will forever regret that. Every evening I came home from school, until my mom got home from work, my father would sit me down and talk to me about his and my mom’s problems, wanting sympathy and for me to see that my mom was such a horrible person, something a 10yo shouldn’t have to be dealing with at that time in their life, but from 10 years old til my mom divorced him when I was 18 and we moved out of his house, I had to listen to it day in and day out. In fact, I still have to listen to it just about every time I see him. I can finish EACH of his sentences. I’m getting a little more backbone every day, but my father has emotionally, mentally, and psychologically abused me for the last nearly 20 years. I have been thinking…abuse is such a strong word to use in this situation, but that’s exactly what it is and what it was. And it continues. It’s something I cannot talk to anyone about, except my mom. I could write a novel about my narc father. I wish I could go no contact, but unfortunately that’s not an option (too difficult to explain). But one day I’m truly going to have enough and that’s going to be the straw that breaks the camel’s back.

        Thank you again, Roberta, for the comforting words and the true words of how you will feel being the Adult Child of a Narc. I come across articles like yours and feel a big sense of comfort knowing I’m not alone.

        • Dear Godsgotthis,

          Knowing the truth about what has happen is in many ways your salvation. I believe you are strong enough to find your way through the pain. It’s good that your mom can validate your reality. My heart goes out to you. Be good to yourself. Thank you for writing to me

          Best Regards,
          Roberta

  10. Hi there.
    I am a 20 year old son of a narcissistic father. I no longer live with my father, but live with my mom. I feel like neither of them can offer me the love and role model I need.
    I don’t even know where to begin this journey to self-acceptance. I am completely overwhelmed not having made the right friends in high school.

    • Erich,
      Thank you for writing to me. Adult children from abusive homes have to keep showing up when they are scared to death. If you continue to learn about what happen to you and give your shadows a voice you will find the power to heal. You have already begun “this journey to self-acceptance.” Being an outsider has its gifts. You are often able to see reality without the undue influence of the crazy world around you. Allow yourself to be open to attracting healthy mentors that can mirror your goodness and abilities back to you. There is no quick fix to re-parenting yourself. You are worth the hard work.
      Regards,
      Roberta

  11. I can’t thank you enough for having this website. My partner for 13 years is NARCISSIST. AFTER reading all your blogs and stories, I came to realization that HE IS BEYOND repair. I just need advice on how do I get rid off such a person who is toxic to me and my kids. (and he is not the father of my kids). The following things he does: yells, bangs on doors, moves my stuff, sets me and my kids up. When I cry he walks away and when I want to talk to him, he shuts me up. He inflicted so much damage to me and my kids and my kids are mad with me how come I have not gotten rid of him. He made me believe that I am worthless, fat, and nobody will ever want me with 2 of my kids. But enough is enough, GAME OVER, THE END HAS COME.. I JUST NEED help on how to get rid of him. Seems like he is buying time and is not planning on moving out of my OWN HOUSE. We have nothing together. I moved him out of my room. He sleeps in a living room. I can’t bring family and friends over because of what he might do or say. He belittles us, put each one of us against each other, demands and controls us. He is toxic, YES HE IS VAMPIRE OF MY ENERGY. I want him out. And he rejected me in love, sex, attention, freedom, etc. And to top it off, he has homosexual tendendies. This is what I am living with. Please help me make right and correct moves. He is unapproachable. Won’t talk to me only to fight.. I AM DONE HELPLESS BUT HOPEFUL. Thank you.

    • Dear Hopeful For Better Life,
      Thank you for writing to me. Nothing can make us feel crazier than expecting something from someone that has nothing to give. What I’m going to advise is a suggestion only. I do not know your particular situation. You and your children’s safety need to be a priority. Please read National Coalition Against Domestic Violence: Safety Plan for Leaving an Abusive Relationship “http://www.ncadv.org/protectyourself/SafetyPlan.php”

      Be prepared to have him move on a planned day. I would not discuss your plans with him. If he is likely to get violent when you insist he leaves I would go to my local police department and tell them about your concerns for your safety. They can provide an officer at the house during his moving out. Make sure you bring a copy of your rental agreement or proof of home ownership with you when you go to the police department. If you can do this safely, you might want to pack all his stuff yourself ahead of time and put it outside the home or in your garage. Change all the locks on your house immediately once he is out including your phone number. All communication must stop once he leaves (forever). Video cameras can be installed on your property to document any stalking.

      Enlist the support of family and/or friends on the day you move him out of your home. You want to make sure whoever is supporting you does not engage with him. This includes you and your children. The relationship is over and you no longer have anything to discuss with him or to explain. This situation calls for you to temporarily detach from your emotions and use your intellect. Let the emotional battering and your anger motivate self-care and courage. My heart goes out to you; this is probably one of the harder life situations you will face. I am sending much hope and support your way. I will follow-up my response to you with some future posts on the challenges you have presented to me. Thank you again.

      Roberta

    • How familiar is your nightmare to the life I have lived. My last partner was the same, the only difference was that he did not live with me… When I finally reached the breaking point, I changed my phone number and never heard from him again … I feel terrible for you in this situation … How to get him out of your home and our of your life… Your nightmare is real and no one can see it or understand it except you or those of us who have lived this way … Your life is your own… It does not belong to him…. I pray that you can rid yourself of this parasite and go on to live a life you create… Your children wil eventually see him for who he truly is … I wish you a happy fulfilled life… You don’t deserve this.

  12. My kids spend 50% of their time with their father, who I believe is a passive-aggressive narcissist. I find myself doing damage control with the oldest, who is 14. I think he tries to use guilt and shame to control her. My real concern is with the youngest, who is 12. She is a people pleaser. This line made me think of her: “They tend to never disagree and are the first to apologize when they are being abused.” She never disagrees, except with her sister. What can I do to help her? I don’t want her to marry someone like her father.

    • Wendy,

      I’ve worked with many parents over the years that have been in your situation and I have witnessed the powerlessness they feel. I am going to ask you some questions to ponder based on my experience. My questions are not asked as a judgment about you.

      Fortunately, there is hope for resiliency in the children that have a sick parent. The most important protective factor in a child’s resiliency is having positive role models; preferably a healthy parent. You are the hope for your children’s well-being. Your sensitive child is learning how to relate to her father and future partners by watching you. Do you or did you have a voice in your relationship with your ex-husband? Are you modeling self-compassion and personal growth from your mistakes? Do you remind your children often that they are precious and not responsible for the problems when you were married or for problems you may be having now? Are you completing your emotional work so your sensitive child doesn’t have to do it for you? Do you ever complain to your children about their father? Do you ask your children for information about what their father is up to? Are there any family secrets nobody can talk about? Are you entitled to your feelings? Can you appropriately express your anger, sadness, frustration, etc.? Is it safe for your children to express anger, sadness, frustration, anxiety, fear, or disappointment in your home? When a child of divorce has at least one healthy safe parent they often learn to handle life’s realities and hardships well. Your sensitive child needs to see you model a self-compassionate, assertive, safe woman who does not accept relationship abuse. I’m sending my respect to you for being concerned about your children’s welfare. Thank you for writing to me.

      • It’s been three and a half years since I wrote that. The kids no longer have contact with their father. It was his choice, he told them that he “didn’t want to be their father anymore” after spending much of the day telling them what he disliked about them. The oldest left that conversation and asked me to come pick her up. She was 6 hours away and on a “vacation” with her father. He tried to stop me from coming by saying, “he didn’t mean it.” I’ve been down that road many times and wasn’t going to give into it this time. She hasn’t talked to him since.

        The youngest was always his golden child, but she appears to be doing well. She is very opinionated, gets good grades in weighted classes, and participates in athletics. He called her once, after her State competition. She showed the caller id to her sister and both of their eyes got wide. They went to the bedroom. The older sister stayed for about 10 minutes, then left. I tried not to pay too much attention to the conversation, but she was not upset during or after it.

        The kids don’t talk about him at all. We once saw him on the city street and they ducked down in the car. I hate that they don’t have a father, and that they weren’t raised in a healthy two-parent house. However, those goals were impossible with him.

        • How extraordinary. For a moment I thought I was reading my diary. My two adult children haven’t seen or spoken to their father for over ten years. His cruelty and lack of love astounded me. I recall a night when he was still living with us. The children were 10 and 7 years old. He would come home from work with his 12 pack of beer, eat his dinner in demanded silence, then sit watching tv, drinking and smoking. He had started a project of building a cardboard Cinderella castle. It was a pre-fabricated cut-out book, and he was doing it ‘ for the kids’. What the children actually wanted was some attention, some help with their homework, some kind of interaction with this man who was no more than a boarder who came and went. He was their biological father and we had been married for 15 years. As the night wore on and the alcohol began to take effect, the children were becoming tired and silly. He hated this time of night as they struggled to gain his attention before the day was over. He lost his temper, started screaming at them, how ungrateful they were, how he was building this castle for them. My daughter, the eldest, said … ‘We don’t want a castle!’… ‘That’s your castle and you’re making it for yourself’. I was doing my usual damage control, trying to negotiate with everyone so that it wouldn’t escalate into a battle. Their father threw the castle on the floor and proceeded to stomp on it. I can still see the cardboard turrets being flattened and blood spattering everywhere. He was howling like a mad man, continuing to stomp and destroy the hours of work he had put into this project, the hard carboard had cut his feet, the stomping had sprained one of his ankles… The children were screaming and crying, I was pleading with him to stop. I finally took the kids into their room and shut the door. He continued his tantrum for some time, began throwing things and screaming, then silence. When we came out of their room, the living room was covered in cardboard, blood, plants, books and cigarette butts… I settled my children after some time, read them some stories, and lay with them until they fell asleep. He returned home to a quiet apartment. I was sitting in the darkness realizing I could no longer live this way. He hobbled in, didn’t speak, went right to our bedroom and shut the door. This would begin one of many nights when I would sleep on the couch. Eventually I told him to leave. He demanded to see the children every two weeks and our lawyers signed the papers. For several years they humoured him by spending the allotted time with him. That ended when my son almost died from dehydration after contracting the Norwalk Virus. If not for my daughter, he wouldn’t be with us today. He had begun vomiting and couldn’t stand up… His fingers were turning blue and my daughter tried waking her drunk father from his sleep. Finally she called an ambulance and he woke up with a start when they arrived. My son was severely dehydrated and required hospitalization. I will never forget that early morning phone call from my daughter … I raced to the hospital in a taxi and found my son on intravenous. I had passed his father outside having his pacifying cigarette. My son recovered but I did not. My daughter refused to go back to her fathers apartment and I told him the agreement was over. That the game was over. My kids are now in their thirties. My daughter is married and expecting her first child. My son lives with me in the same apartment we used to share with his father. None of us speak to him or know anything about his life. He has left a terror behind that none of us have forgotten. His narcissism has impacted our daily lives to this day. It has been a struggle to maintain our sanity and stability. As I grow older I realize I thought that I could fix him…. That I had enough joy for both of us… Instead he took my joy, and left me and my children frightened and incapable of trusting anyone. The relief is that he is gone, the tragedy is that he will never be forgotten.

  13. I like your advice here best, “The biggest challenge is giving yourself permission to learn what is right for you and developing endurance for sitting with the bad feelings that come up when you are breaking the family rules.” It’s funny how we have to consciously give ourselves permission, but I have found the more I do, the more I learn and the better I feel when confronting new problems.

    • The best things that have happen to me in my life have come out of facing adversity. Life is bittersweet. Thank you for adding me to your Must Read Blog page. I appreciate your support with our purpose. It brings home the understanding that we are all in it together.
      Roberta

      • You’re welcome. I like to think of it as sweet and bitter, but that’s my sometimes overwhelming perky optimism speaking. Keep the great work. The world needs access to better solutions.

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